I’ve been the weird one in the room for a long time. This week I went to a business training event. Everyone there had a business with either a tangible product or service- carpet cleaning, pest removal, website design, selling houses. And then there was me, the Coach who helps people tap into their inner guidance and awaken your potential.
The first 2 times that I had to share at this training I felt the blood rush to my face.
I tried to speak with courage so they wouldn’t see that I felt vulnerable. Hiring someone to clean your house, cook for your elder parent, getting a new roof, or having the proper piping in your brewery- these were all such Necessary businesses.
I couldn’t sneak away (even though a small part of me wanted to). I’m called to do this work, even though it pushes me out of my comfort zone on a weekly basis. I shared my intro and a part of me felt like compared to everyone else, I was sharing a luxury business. (I tried not to eyeroll at myself).
After you’ve taken care of all your home & health basics, now let’s talk about your dreams, habits, the potholes you always fall in, the issues you can’t break free of yet.
Of course, I’m acutely aware of how Maslow’s hierarchy of needs plays out, having been a teacher for years and seeing how often the students having the hardest time at school were also having the hardest times at home, because some aspect of their basic survival is being neglected.
So I serve a need that is not purely about survival and yet, I think that this is the crux of our time in history right now. We have surpassed, many of us, the need for pure survival and as a species we understand how to move past that. As to having effective systems for tapping into our own wisdom, listening to our inner voice, and believing in ourselves, most of us could use more support in that arena.
Other folks were asking “Do you have a problem with roaches at your house?” “Do you need a 2 car garage?” and I was asking “Would you be doing better in business or life if you have more confidence and assurance in yourself?” “Would you be willing to explore how your quirks are not something to reject, but rather to rejoice?”
I had to keep telling the scared voice inside that its ok to be doing this deeply emotional and personal. That one business service is not inherently better than another.
Do the judgments in your mind actually help you to improve or help out anyone else? In my experience, usually not.
You see, I still have to coach myself. I still have to tell myself that what I do is important as wedding photography or car repair. But it doesn’t mean that the doubts don’t try to creep in sometimes.
Do you ever have moments when you’re the only one of your type in the room and suddenly you start questioning yourself?
I really don’t mind being the odd one out, but it definitely takes extra energy for me to show up when I feel that way. Halfway through the day, the trainer turned to me and said I’ve got the hardest job in there to convince someone to buy my services (gee, thanks!).
I understand why he said it. When you have a leaky pipe, you can’t say, well this isn’t a good month to focus on plumbing, I’ll deal with that later. No, you address it immediately.
But when do you pause and say, Now, now is the time that I hire someone to help me reach my full potential. This is the month I work with fears and start doing something about it. This is the season where I start loving myself, belly rolls, stretch marks, and all.
I can relate. I felt the calling to do this work and ignored it for 2 full years. For 2 full years my intuition spoke up in my journals, my walks, my meditation, my dreams. It told me to stop teaching gardening and start teaching deep empowerment, spiritual truths, love for self, love for Mother Earth, and more.
And I said,
“No.
No thanks.
No.
I don’t want to,”
time and time again.
I deeply believe in the line from the Gospel of Thomas:
“If you bring forth what is within you,
what you bring forth will save you.
If you do not bring forth what is within you,
what you do not bring forth will destroy you.”
I ultimately decided to start taking steps towards my calling, even though I knew it didn’t make any sense to everyone else. I have to live with myself and I couldn’t live being haunted by the fact about how I would feel, what would I regret if I didn’t at least try what I was called to do. Because I have a weird calling that rejects logic and circumstance, I’m compassionate and understanding to others struggling with their concerns and fears.
I am in the business of the the intangible. In our world we have a much easier time with the tangible and the visible, then with the invisible and undefined.
Yet while the ideas – confidence, inner guidance, peace, focus might be invisible, the results leave signs and build a foundation that supports your life and brings you forward.
I’m willing to show up and be the weird one, because every time I’m out there being weird, I know that chances are it gives someone else who feels a little bit weird and a little bit out of place to feel like maybe they aren’t so weird after all.
What’s your weird thing or place where you stand out from the others?
